Jennifer, my husband and I bought our first house in Southern California when we were both struggling financially, but ti was the best investment we ever made. We were farther out of the area were we had lived and could walk to everything we desired, but it was an investment is US, our family and future. Later we had the opportunity to relocate to North Carolina, and our lifestyle here is more of what I always dreamed my California life would be: we live in an affordable community with great schools, people from all over the world, and can walk to shops, restaurants and theatre. All without the fear of the next earthquake! I guess what I am trying to say is home is where you make it, and many other places outside of where you are now may suit your needs; you just have to explore what is out there. Best of luck to you!

Jennifer--You seem pretty upbeat and positive! There is a lot of hype right now about "The Secret". Some good, some bad. I am a firm believer (with the help of The Secret") that you can do whatever you want to do. Staying in the city, loving your life and family and knowing that your possibilities are endless is your best bet--in my opinion. lAso, have a plan B--everyone needs one these days! I'm a lot more financially secure now that I've found mine! I'd be happy to share more...
jonesgirl04@yahoo.com

Can you afford to not be in the city? You said that you're happy and comfortable. If you moved to the suburbs, you'd likely be bored and lonely. Think of all the things you and your children would miss out on. In addition, you'd spend precious family time commuting and running errands always in the car. Is that really worth a little extra space and a lawn? I have friends who wrestle with the suburb vs city question, but for us, it's no question and never will be. Or, you might consider another city that would give you the advantages you like about San Fran but would be less expensive?

We just moved from Chicago to a nice suburb about an hour away. We always said that we'd move someday, and while the kids are fine, we are the ones missing Chicago! I loved having the babies in the city--there was always so much to do in walking distance, etc., and the babies loved the buggy and walks. But we started looking and found the perfect house in a great suburb with great schools. It's the perfect fit for our size, and while we really miss living in the city, we'll be settled and part of the community by the time the kids get to school. (Right now they are 3 1/2 and almost 2). Enjoy the city and your lifestyle now!

You didn't indicate the gender of your children. If they are different, you will have to move eventually. Also, paying rent is like pouring money down the drain. If you want to live in a city then researching other areas is the option you should take. Good luck with your decision.

After moving over 20 times in my young adulthood and living all over the country I would like to encourage Jennifer to stay where she is. It has been my experience that Location, Location, Location does have some merit. Having exposure to diversity and culture is no trade off for a larger home or a bit more money left over at the end of the month. Even though money is tight, the reality of the city, and its opportunities for the kids and family as a whole, far outweighs the financial comfort. In my opinion I would stay. After all Money will always be money, but the experiences of San Francisco are priceless.

Jennifer, reading your article, I felt as if you were telling my story. We are the same age, have a boy 2 years old and a girl just over a year. I live in a two bedroom home and always am thinking about moving. Right now we live in a midwest town with all of our family with in 10 miles of us. Work is only a few miles away. With all that said, I would love a bigger house (so the kids could have their own rooms) and yard (so the three labs could run free). When looking around our area, in order for us to have that we would have to move over 30 miles away to afford my dream. I love living close to work and family. I'm not sure I would be happy driving 45 min both ways to work and to see the family. Is my dream home more important to me than my family time. Right now I don't think I would want to spend that time in the car and not playing as much with my kids. So think about what's most important to you. Your space you live in or what you do in that space and your surroundings.