This is just what crazy people do: they drive you so nuts that you start questioning yourself. I'm sure you are not doing anything wrong, being too nice, or not nice enough. Some people just don't care about doing a good job because they are lazy, selfish, lack the necessary skills, or all of the above. It's not nice, but it's true. I hope the project will be done soon.

oh lord. This is waaaay too familiar territory! I'm so sorry - for you, for me.
We threatened to take our contractor to small claims court and he finally agreed to business mediation. We got our project finished, but he got more money than we think he should have.
This was over a year ago. It was part of the reason I went on an anti-depressant for six months.
There are still some bitter moments, but I was worried that the whole situation would somehow color my home for me. It has not - I have not let it. We are very happy now, but it was hellish and it makes you very wary of anyone you need to give money to after that. I mean, the grocery store, fer cryin' out loud. Well, live and learn.

OMG, I think you hired my brother-in-law!

Margo, how awful that your experience led to anti-depressants. Shame on him! Luckily this is not our contractor--I adore our contractor, who has actually done much to correct the work of this other person, He Who Will Not Be Named. Things have gotten better as of this week but there have been a mystifying number of mistakes from this one person....

Oh my, I think everyone must have a contractor story. I have at least 3. As my husband says, there is a reason they are contractors and don't work in the "real" world

I think you should add one more to your list...

20) Do you still live with your mother?

Good luck! Hope it's finished before the new year.

http://tlc-smileygirl.blogspot.com/

There are ways to protect yourself during construction and renovations. Here are a few:

Get building permits - your contractor may try to talk you out of pulling permits - if he does, get another contractor. Permits ensure the work is done properly and to code - permits protect YOU!

Ask for references and call them - go see the work if you can. If a contractor balks at giving you references, ask yourself what he's trying to hide. Then get a new contractor.

Call the Better Business Bureau and check up on the contractor. Call any organization that involves building and renovation and make sure he is a member in good standing.

Many contractors are great at their trade but are not great communicators. Ask questions upfront and all the way through the job - if you don't understand something, get it in writing. Have him draw pictures. Do whatever it takes to ensure he understands your expectations. If he doesn't communicate well at the outset, he never will.

The job will always take longer and cost more than you expect. Plan on it.

Never pay in full until you are completely satisfied with the job.

If you're renovating your kitchen, make sure you think about how you will use your kitchen. Walk through the kitchen and make notes -- when you're unloading food from the fridge - do you have a counter nearby where you can place the food? Will the dishwasher door open in front of the cupboard where you store dishes - if so, you'll have to empty the dishwasher onto the counter, close the dishwasher door and then put the dishes away! What about flooring - slate floors are lovely but they will give you a backache. Same with ceramic. Many contractors hang cupboards too high for a woman. Many contractors don't install enough lighting and outlets. Lately it's all about counter space but if you have to set all your appliances and serving pieces on the counter, you may want less counter space and a few extra cupboards. Glass front cupboards are nice but you can't store much in them - they're more for show.

My kitchen was renovated before I bought the house -- it's gorgeous but there is very little task lighting, the space between the oven and breakfast bar is so small that in order to open the oven door, anyone sitting at the breakfast bar has to get up and move, and the pantry shelves are so poorly made they can't hold more than a couple cans of food without collapsing. The kitchen is esthetically pleasing but it sure wasn't created for an avid cook! I had the original contractor come out to make changes and he was insulted! He told me my kitchen had been shown in a magazine! He never returned my calls after that!

I've never had a kitchen renovated, but I have friends who have, and their best advice to me was twofold: 1. Never hire your friends 2. Never hire anyone who you know has "issues" and 'is fine as long as they take their meds' ... need I go on? Three years later, their windows are drafty and their kitchen isn't done. They're living with it until they save up for another go-round.

We renovated our kitchen about 5years ago, and the best choice I made was to hire a kitchen designer...she was great and inexpensive compared to the cost of the renovation. So glad I didn't trust a contractor for the design!!

And the thing is, you CAN'T ask them! While we were able to laugh at the challenges our renovation brought (as seen in a previous post), my sister-in-law ended up in a lawsuit along with a couple of dozen other clients of her criminal contractor (who is now in jail). We're the LUCKY ones!

How about this question? So...how many drinks did you have last night? I think it goes with the field!
We went through two contractors and they both had "issues." Call them at night sometime and you will see!

There are 19 questions I now want to ask you, such as, who told you you couldn't fire a contractor? Did you pay the guy up front? Do you know how to be assertive?

Not sure if your comment is directed at me or not; this isn't my contractor I'm talking about. This is, luckily, just a supporting actor in the whole kitchen reno. drama. My contractor, God bless him, is stepping in to save the day.

You are giving me a serious case of the shakes. Why did I let my husband take a sledgehammer to the kitchen wall and take us irretrievably down a contractor road?
I think we can all agree that the answer to #18 is a resoundiing, "Heck no!"
The only good experience I ever had with a contractor was purely out of spite. He was reroofing the addition to our house and we'd just brought our first daughter home. He started disappearing and the piles of debris sat and sat, ruining our lawn and just generally being a neighborhood eyesore. The roof still leaks, and the other jobs he "did" still haunt us, but, as I was trying to track him down he was going through a bitter break up. He made the mistake of giving me his home phone, so whenever I called to complain I got the bitter ex and she would gleefully tell me that she'd be passing along my message and then some. Though his work was shoddy, he always showed up tail between his legs after I'd call her.

Wishing you luck & patience.

Amanda
http://lifewithbriar.blogspot.com
http://toddlywinks.blogspot.com

I am sorry and glad to hear your contractor is helping...#8 is classic and I will need to bite my tongue so I do not ask that in future. Good Luck!

Here's a question: how does one truly remove plaster dust (or blue board dust, tile/grout dust, plain old saw dust, etc.) from their home during renovations? More than the contractor, it may mean the end of my sanity!

I was lucky... I was married to the contractor.... My kitchen is totally custom and was done in an around other kitchens that paid the bills. In fact my whole house has been renovated over a 30 year period and we stayed married and the customers kept coming back. My only piece of advise.... Ask EVERYONE for recommendations, My husband never advertised... all his work was word of mouth.